The Queen Mum's 100th Birthday   The family took The Queen Mother, in her wheelchair, out onto the lawn where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place.  The Queen Mum couldn't talk very well, so she carried a small notepad with her, to write notes when she needed to communicate. After a short time out on the lawn, the Queen Mum started leaning off to the right, so some family members grabbed her, straightened her up, and stuffed pillows on her right side.  A short time later she started leaning off to her left.  Again, family members grabbed her and stuffed pillows on her left.  Soon she started leaning forward.  The family members again grabbed her  and tied a pillowcase around her waist to hold her up. A nephew, arriving late, ran to the Queen Mum saying, "Hi, Grannie, you're looking good, how are they treating you?" The Queen Mum took out her notepad and slowly wrote a note: "They won't let me fart."